So my biggest problem in my life is organization. I live in a constant state of chaos it feels, and becoming a mother has only made it worse. In addition to all of the clutter that hubby and I have accumulated over the years, we now have endless piles of baby clothes and toys to add to the already cluttered state that our home had become. I try my best to keep it "clean enough" but some days it feels that I can't catch a break. That being said, I wouldn't trade it for the world. L is my whole universe now and I just need to figure out how to work life around this new gravitational pull.
It seems that the organization aspect has spilled over to my crochet life and my writing life as well. I want to start selling some crochet pieces to help out with the cost of fertility treatments to add to our family. It is quite expensive, and here in Nova Scotia there is absolutely no coverage so we have to pay just to walk in the door of our specialist's office. The problem is, I have no idea what prices to charge, how to market my pieces at a rate that I can keep up with the orders, and I have a growing list of "gift" pieces that I want to start on or finish up. I have the drive to do it, but I just can't seem to find an appropriate time or order to approach it all.
Then there is my writing. I have done hours of research into what successful authors have done to approach their writing. I recognize the importance of developing your characters, plotting out your timeline, ensuring that your plot is consistent and complete, and generally planning the entire story before you even start. The problem is, I just want to write it. I've come to realize though that I need to do these things based on my four previous attempts that I deemed not good enough when I read them. I find myself confused by the storyline at certain points or I lose focus on what I was trying to say.
So, I'm resisting the urge. I'm trying to take each crochet project one at a time. I'm trying to write character sketches for at least six characters who will have a strong role in my story. I'm trying to map out a timeline and a plot line that are cohesive and concise since I'm trying to keep my story below 80,000 words. I'm also trying not to allow my day to end without spending at least a little time with my hook and my computer to pick away at the list of things that I want to get done.
Now I just need to master better time management and get the nap time and bedtime kinks worked out.
Monday, 14 January 2013
Sunday, 13 January 2013
The beginning of my writing revival
In December of 2010, I sat down at my computer and opened up a simple Word document. I was having a particularly sad day. My husband and I had been trying to start a family for nearly a year. We had recently found out that we did indeed have a medical cause for the delay, and we were in the process of initial testing through a Reproductive Endocrinologist. We were unsure what the future held, and to be honest we were struggling to stay strong as a couple at that point.
I had recently revived my love of reading that university had drained all of the fun from, so I was again focused on the escape that reading could provide. I used to write a lot in junior high, so I decided to see if I still had a love for it as well.
I sat at the computer and began to type. I hadn't planned anything. I had no character sketches, no plot summaries, not even a simple brainstorm on hand. I simply began to write. To my dismay, I had nearly twelve pages written within a few hours. I began to get excited about the story that had so suddenly formed in front of me. I continued to dapple with it, and those twelve pages grew to nearly one hundred fairly quickly.
I then did something that I regret doing. I shared with a few family and friends that I had begun writing. and then I shared it with even more people. Over the next few months as our testing progressed and we were given the heartbreaking news that we would need In-Vitro Fertilization to conceive a child, my passion for the writing began to dwindle. Writing had become less fun for me. It still allowed me to escape the hurt of infertility, but the fun was gone.
Thankfully, my husband and I made a decision that we would not allow infertility to destroy us. Instead, we would use it as a way to strengthen the bond and love that we shared. We vowed that we would fight...and that we would win in the end.
As our journey continued, I still wrote from time to time. Sadly though the story that I have grown to love is still unwritten. I have re-started it no less than four times now, my most recent being just this past week.
I've come to realize that while I have what I believe to be a good story to tell, my main protagonist was too perfect to allow the story to evolve the way that I have envisioned over the past two years. So, I have started fresh. Perhaps some day I will post a small portion of my story here, but for now I am going to keep my beautiful Aubrey and all of the love I have for her to myself. She will be my outlet as I take a few moments of down time in this exciting journey through motherhood, and will probably console me as I long for another child to add to the love in our family.
Perhaps I will get to share her with the world someday, or perhaps she will only be a personal achievement. The only way that I will ever get to find out though is by getting the story that has been so constant in my head out onto paper.
I had recently revived my love of reading that university had drained all of the fun from, so I was again focused on the escape that reading could provide. I used to write a lot in junior high, so I decided to see if I still had a love for it as well.
I sat at the computer and began to type. I hadn't planned anything. I had no character sketches, no plot summaries, not even a simple brainstorm on hand. I simply began to write. To my dismay, I had nearly twelve pages written within a few hours. I began to get excited about the story that had so suddenly formed in front of me. I continued to dapple with it, and those twelve pages grew to nearly one hundred fairly quickly.
I then did something that I regret doing. I shared with a few family and friends that I had begun writing. and then I shared it with even more people. Over the next few months as our testing progressed and we were given the heartbreaking news that we would need In-Vitro Fertilization to conceive a child, my passion for the writing began to dwindle. Writing had become less fun for me. It still allowed me to escape the hurt of infertility, but the fun was gone.
Thankfully, my husband and I made a decision that we would not allow infertility to destroy us. Instead, we would use it as a way to strengthen the bond and love that we shared. We vowed that we would fight...and that we would win in the end.
As our journey continued, I still wrote from time to time. Sadly though the story that I have grown to love is still unwritten. I have re-started it no less than four times now, my most recent being just this past week.
I've come to realize that while I have what I believe to be a good story to tell, my main protagonist was too perfect to allow the story to evolve the way that I have envisioned over the past two years. So, I have started fresh. Perhaps some day I will post a small portion of my story here, but for now I am going to keep my beautiful Aubrey and all of the love I have for her to myself. She will be my outlet as I take a few moments of down time in this exciting journey through motherhood, and will probably console me as I long for another child to add to the love in our family.
Perhaps I will get to share her with the world someday, or perhaps she will only be a personal achievement. The only way that I will ever get to find out though is by getting the story that has been so constant in my head out onto paper.
New to the World of Blogging
As a project for 2013, I've decided that it is time to try my hand at Blogging. I know several people who are active bloggers and I enjoy reading their posts immensely. So, it is my turn.
I'm not sure yet where this blog will take me. Crochet, reading, writing, our world of parenting and infertility...the possibilities are numerous. These are a few of the topics that I hold central in my life. I find that my thoughts become clearest when I write them out. Perhaps I can use this space to do that.
I'll add a disclaimer here and now that with regards to the topic of infertility, I tend to share openly. There may sometimes be what others consider to be too much information into the inner workings of fertility treatments. However, if my own experiences can help another couple who are struggling with the sting of infertility, than it is worth it to me.
Our son is the most amazing gift we have ever been given. He is the result of over two years of tears, testing and finally triumph during our struggle with infertility. We hope that someday soon we'll be able to add to our family, but for now we are savouring every day, every milestone and every moment with our In-Vitro Fertilization miracle.
I'm not sure yet where this blog will take me. Crochet, reading, writing, our world of parenting and infertility...the possibilities are numerous. These are a few of the topics that I hold central in my life. I find that my thoughts become clearest when I write them out. Perhaps I can use this space to do that.
I'll add a disclaimer here and now that with regards to the topic of infertility, I tend to share openly. There may sometimes be what others consider to be too much information into the inner workings of fertility treatments. However, if my own experiences can help another couple who are struggling with the sting of infertility, than it is worth it to me.
Our son is the most amazing gift we have ever been given. He is the result of over two years of tears, testing and finally triumph during our struggle with infertility. We hope that someday soon we'll be able to add to our family, but for now we are savouring every day, every milestone and every moment with our In-Vitro Fertilization miracle.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)