The beginning of my writing revival

In December of 2010, I sat down at my computer and opened up a simple Word document. I was having a particularly sad day. My husband and I had been trying to start a family for nearly a year. We had recently found out that we did indeed have a medical cause for the delay, and we were in the process of initial testing through a Reproductive Endocrinologist. We were unsure what the future held, and to be honest we were struggling to stay strong as a couple at that point.

I had recently revived my love of reading that university had drained all of the fun from, so I was again focused on the escape that reading could provide. I used to write a lot in junior high, so I decided to see if I still had a love for it as well.

I sat at the computer and began to type. I hadn't planned anything. I had no character sketches, no plot summaries, not even a simple brainstorm on hand. I simply began to write. To my dismay, I had nearly twelve pages written within a few hours. I began to get excited about the story that had so suddenly formed in front of me. I continued to dapple with it, and those twelve pages grew to nearly one hundred fairly quickly.

I then did something that I regret doing. I shared with a few family and friends that I had begun writing. and then I shared it with even more people. Over the next few months as our testing progressed and we were given the heartbreaking news that we would need In-Vitro Fertilization to conceive a child, my passion for the writing began to dwindle. Writing had become less fun for me. It still allowed me to escape the hurt of infertility, but the fun was gone.

Thankfully, my husband and I made a decision that we would not allow infertility to destroy us. Instead, we would use it as a way to strengthen the bond and love that we shared. We vowed that we would fight...and that we would win in the end.

As our journey continued, I still wrote from time to time. Sadly though the story that I have grown to love is still unwritten. I have re-started it no less than four times now, my most recent being just this past week.

I've come to realize that while I have what I believe to be a good story to tell, my main protagonist was too perfect to allow the story to evolve the way that I have envisioned over the past two years. So, I have started fresh. Perhaps some day I will post a small portion of my story here, but for now I am going to keep my beautiful Aubrey and all of the love I have for her to myself. She will be my outlet as I take a few moments of down time in this exciting journey through motherhood, and will probably console me as I long for another child to add to the love in our family.

Perhaps I will get to share her with the world someday, or perhaps she will only be a personal achievement. The only way that I will ever get to find out though is by getting the story that has been so constant in my head out onto paper.